The Enemy

I'm going to try and be as short about this as I can. I know I need some sleep (who are we kidding) but I also know that God is taking Jake on this crazy journey not only to grow us as Christians, but as a testimony to someone that's quietly struggling. I couldn't keep this to myself. Not today.

John 10:10 - "The enemy comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.".

Jake and I have been praying for a vision. We've been praying for a vision that would help us in our decision process when that time comes. A face, a name, gender, ANYTHING! I spent Friday night of last week pleading with God. Pacing the house, desperately seeking His presence. I haven't ever prayed so urgently before. I haven't remembered a dream in a long time, and that night, I did. We were walking into our house after returning home from Ukraine. We came home empty handed with no children. Cole walked into the house before us and when I walked in, there was a HUGE rattlesnake, in our kitchen, coiled and ready to strike Cole and the rest of us. And that was the end of the dream. I know what snakes represent. That dream served as my warning. The enemy is lurking, waiting to strike. And he will use some of our greatest fears to cripple us. He struck today.

We have known from the day that God led us to adopt in Ukraine that a lot of the children available for international adoption aren't deemed "healthy". In adoption world, the word "healthy" is very loosely used and I think it's safe to assume that children living in orphanages will have some issues, whether they be social, mental, physical, whatever. These children are broken and hurting and living in less than desirable conditions. Right now in Ukraine it is almost the perfect storm. Apparently a ridiculous number of people are on vacation, paperwork is getting back logged up back logged, referrals aren't being processed the way they should be, etc. We received a call from our facilitator today telling us that due to this "perfect storm" there are "no good referrals".  A good referral would be a child a mild or correctable medical condition. So you can imagine what a "not good" referral will be. She gave us options. Options to request a rescheduled appointment date and a few others. She reiterated that their goal was to make sure that we bring home an addition to our family, so if we wanted to reschedule that was ok.  We had to make a decision by tonight if we were going to move forward with our appointment on the 7th or not.

Here's what I know.....the enemy comes to distract. To separate us from what we know to be truth. And today, that's what he did. He took a mustard seed sized non-issue and used it to play on some of our greatest fears. And what is that fear? That God will take us even further out of our comfort zone. When our facilitator first gave me the options I knew the answer. We go anyways. She calls it taking a gamble. I call it walking in faith. And then I told Jake and yeah, we were both discouraged. And the first thing we did was pray. I don't even think Jake knew the words that were coming out of his mouth. 20 minutes later Jake read to me Phillipians 3:12-14 -"¹² Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. ¹³ Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, ¹⁴ I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."  Yes! We press on!  Why? Because God called us to adoption. He went WAY out of His way to first call me and then Jake and Cole. He raised $26,000 for us. We didn't do that. God did that. He surrounded us with people that have a heart for God and a heart for orphans to pray us through this tough stuff. God has created His very own perfect storm in us. We press on.

So what? What happens if we open the file and there's a disability? When I was pregnant with Cole and Zella and they offered us all of the testing for downs syndrome and spina bifida, etc. we declined. Why? Because it didn't matter. EVERY child is a gift from the Lord. We knew that God was blessing us with the perfect children for our family. And we know that still today. We will show up on August 7th. We will pray without ceasing. We will be especially sensitive to His soft whispers. We will choose the file that God has chosen for us and we will love those children, without hesitation, because they are gifts from the Lord and He chose them for our family. They are ours just as much as Cole and Zella are ours. Perfectly crafted. Will it be hard? Yessir. Will we be stretched to limits we never thought our faith could go? Absolutely. BUT unlike the enemy, GOD and His promises and His truth, just as it says in John 10:10, those things bring life and life to its fullest. I choose life. I choose life for our family and all of our children. There is no room for the enemy's lies in this house so get under my feet!

And you can take that to the bank, devil!